One of my favourite hobbies when travelling is to record the magnificent, bonkers, gobbledegook ‘English’ t-shirts worn by people in the places I go. These are the ones I collected from when I was in Java. You’re absolutely welcome.
Some of them literally had me stock-still, snorting with laughter in the street, while people around me gave me weird looks.
Fries before guys
I endorse this message.
Don’t waste my fucking time
On a boy about 5 on a bike.
Dream birds: dream create future
This was on a cap on a bloke with a chicken in a bag that he took on the bus.
Stop drug: continue work
I understand what this is trying to say but I’m really confused.
Hongouts Style Be your true self Quality! Fuck off!
Quality should fuck off, or you should fuck off, because I’m quality?
Poke Owl lets go Jogja
There was so much Yogyakarta-based merchandise. This was one of the ones I saw that also took advantage of the Pokemon Go craze. So desirable.
Hey Mantan! God bless you!
Maybe Mantan is a term of endearment.
Turn back crime – look around and you’ll see us
Are they pretending to be the police?
Mad infected dog
I wish this man knew what impression this gave.
Best wishes! You will still love tomorrow
“Perfection is the child of time” – Joseph Hall
Who is Joseph Hall? And why is he saying semi-coherent quotes?
“Whoever you are, be a good one” – Abraham Lincoln
My sleep my adventure
I endorse this message too.
If I were the UK, I’d never let EU go
YES. THIS IS OUTSTANDING. YES.
Futura condensed extrabold italic
Learn like you will live forever
I presume this means ‘Have a great appetite for learning’. How would you learn if you were living forever?
I bite through the big wall, I sit there and sulk, you’re so pretty when you’re on you’re your
An example of one of the t-shirts that I stopped and stared at.
All the best things are wild and free
Love Paris, Paris is always a good idea
Dunno if it is, though.
When I’m with you I’m feline good
Welcome to Bali I love you full
An example of the ridiculousness masked as being sensible.
I love hard-core
Hard-core what, please?
Scary secret sign, scary from the hell
Some of these t-shirts are scary. Scary scary. You’re welcome.